Okay i love being with my church family and at worship service any time there's a chance. I love to sing ALL the time! But i would have to say that my overall favorite time (next to summer camp of course) would have to be a with Sunday Worship or 5th Wednesday. I love the variety of all the men that lead songs and the different verses and prayers that are all combined to make a beautiful arrangement! Don't get me wrong i love hearing sermons but there is just something about that kind of calloration that just gets to me! and then the fellowship afterwords; WOW!
I am truely so blessed♥
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Thursday, August 16, 2007
a light at the end of the tunnel
though my life is far from being dark and grey, sad and desolate, it is not complete. i have known for quite a while that there is something that i wanted to have in my world but the time and circumstances have not been right and i have been told to wait. i am not good at waitning... i have never been good at waiting if i know you have a present for my birthday BEFORE my birthday i want it now, if i have a Christmas present for you Before Christmas i want you to have it now and to open it now and share your expression with me now... I DO NOT LIKE TO WAIT!!! but i do when i have to AND I HAVE TO! the saying, "there is light at the end of the tunnel" comes to mind as my waiting draws to a new type of waiting.
When i was a young teen we drove to Florida and somewhere between here and there we drove through a very long tunnel. i liked going through the tunnel at first and then got tired of being closed up...and was ready to be out of the tunnel and to our destination. As we neared the end of the tunnel and i could see the light of the outside world, i wanted my dad to drive faster to JUST get there. we finally were out of the tunnel, but we were still far from the end of our journey.
in my personal life, i can see the ligth at the end of the tunnel, but am not to it yet. i want to speed up and be there already but know i will miss important parts of life and relationships by speeding through it and i know mistakes are more easily made at higher speeds. i am also aware that even when i am out of the tunnel of this part of my life and i have more freedoms in what i want and what i am doing, the journey is far from being over. i need prayers that i will not try to speed up the process of being out of the tunnel before i am fully in the light; for the journey is still far from being over.
When i was a young teen we drove to Florida and somewhere between here and there we drove through a very long tunnel. i liked going through the tunnel at first and then got tired of being closed up...and was ready to be out of the tunnel and to our destination. As we neared the end of the tunnel and i could see the light of the outside world, i wanted my dad to drive faster to JUST get there. we finally were out of the tunnel, but we were still far from the end of our journey.
in my personal life, i can see the ligth at the end of the tunnel, but am not to it yet. i want to speed up and be there already but know i will miss important parts of life and relationships by speeding through it and i know mistakes are more easily made at higher speeds. i am also aware that even when i am out of the tunnel of this part of my life and i have more freedoms in what i want and what i am doing, the journey is far from being over. i need prayers that i will not try to speed up the process of being out of the tunnel before i am fully in the light; for the journey is still far from being over.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
moving around and making a mess
well, now that summer is almost over, i am finally motivated to get things done at my house that i keep sying "i'll do it on a break from work" :) well in 3 years of living here and atleast 9 breaks from work i have finally begun cleaning out my spare room.
i have used this room as a storage (and will continue to but with organization) and if you have ever seen it, you will understand. I now can see a floor in there!!! and for 1 day it looked really nice.
my parents are getting a bed from my step-brother so they are sending one of theirs to me, and i need a place for it. but that's doesn't have a time limit and since i need limits and boundaries and dealines; i didn't clean for the bed. But i knew i was getting internet installed and he would need room to walk because i wanted it hooked up in that room. THAT got me to clean it. and it lookint NICE in there.
the next day i decided to move a bookshelf from my entry way to that room and here comes a new mess. i got stuck in the doorway and had to empty the shelf to get it over the carpet but i couldn't get out of the room. so i just started throwing things in the floor.
but i can't clean it becaue i'm not for sure if i want to keep the shelf where it is! i procrastinate that way. i guess i need to get the bed in there so i will begin to see how i want to set up the room and then start moving stuff. i know it will be a nice room someday soon, but it is such a pig pen now!
ok i know that was random but i wanted to blog and couldn't think of anything else and this is JUST MY THOUGHTS!!:)
i have used this room as a storage (and will continue to but with organization) and if you have ever seen it, you will understand. I now can see a floor in there!!! and for 1 day it looked really nice.
my parents are getting a bed from my step-brother so they are sending one of theirs to me, and i need a place for it. but that's doesn't have a time limit and since i need limits and boundaries and dealines; i didn't clean for the bed. But i knew i was getting internet installed and he would need room to walk because i wanted it hooked up in that room. THAT got me to clean it. and it lookint NICE in there.
the next day i decided to move a bookshelf from my entry way to that room and here comes a new mess. i got stuck in the doorway and had to empty the shelf to get it over the carpet but i couldn't get out of the room. so i just started throwing things in the floor.
but i can't clean it becaue i'm not for sure if i want to keep the shelf where it is! i procrastinate that way. i guess i need to get the bed in there so i will begin to see how i want to set up the room and then start moving stuff. i know it will be a nice room someday soon, but it is such a pig pen now!
ok i know that was random but i wanted to blog and couldn't think of anything else and this is JUST MY THOUGHTS!!:)
Friday, August 10, 2007
now online!!!
hello all! i know it's been a VERY LONG TIME but i now have internet at my house, YEAH!!!!!! and it is a lot easier to be online and go to all the sites that the schools secured network won't let me get to :) so i will be blogging now!!! but don't hold your breath, i know it won't be an everyday occurance or anything! looking forward to getting back into it and back into your business :) hahaha!!!!
will blog soon, i promise
will blog soon, i promise
Monday, February 26, 2007
hitting my knees
i am not afraid of very many things but i am afarid of being hurt. And while i am not too keen on emotional pain, i am most afraid of physical pain. i don't want to have scrapes and bruises and drying scaps that pull away and cause itching and extra pain. And when i think about physical pain of anticipate hurt i always direct those thoughs and images to my knees. I'm not sure why i do this, but i have since i was a little girl. If i think about falling, my knees hurts; if i think about a car crash, my knees are the main focus.
and as i am still unsure of the reasoning for this and have embraced never knowing the why i will attribute it to God and my relationship to him. When i put myself into perspective with God, my knees are reverent in the since of relation. God is my master, there for i bow before Him. i am humbled in His presence, i am on my knees. When i talk to him; even though i am not physically doing this, i refer to prayer as hitting my knees.
i don't "hit my knees" as often as i should and maybe the ache in my knees is from the absence my heart feels from not building that relationship with God.
now with that being said. I am asking for prayers, please. Prayers on my behalf to continue making my relationship with God as it should be, therefore turning my relationships with others into what THEY also should be. Also without naming specifics my brother and his family need MANY prayers right now; the situation may not be changed but the effects of the situation can be lessened with prayer as well as strength and comfort be provided to help them all get through it.
and as i am still unsure of the reasoning for this and have embraced never knowing the why i will attribute it to God and my relationship to him. When i put myself into perspective with God, my knees are reverent in the since of relation. God is my master, there for i bow before Him. i am humbled in His presence, i am on my knees. When i talk to him; even though i am not physically doing this, i refer to prayer as hitting my knees.
i don't "hit my knees" as often as i should and maybe the ache in my knees is from the absence my heart feels from not building that relationship with God.
now with that being said. I am asking for prayers, please. Prayers on my behalf to continue making my relationship with God as it should be, therefore turning my relationships with others into what THEY also should be. Also without naming specifics my brother and his family need MANY prayers right now; the situation may not be changed but the effects of the situation can be lessened with prayer as well as strength and comfort be provided to help them all get through it.
Thursday, February 22, 2007
dancing
inspried by andy who was inspired my darla who was commenting to jaci:) sorry, you know i have to be silly!:)
wow! darla's comment about old women dancing in the moolight put such a vibrant picture in my mind and then Andy's blog added a new light to it, a twist with many emaotions attached to the dancing i invisioned. He put experiances to it that made me think of striking out on a new adventure or endeavor without fear... wow! what an inspiration that brings to me.
i can begin new things pretty easily and usually they start out with ease and the void of fear. But as i get just inside something new and begin to think that it is something great~as the song begins to play iand i get the urge to 'dance with life'~; my anxiousness and panic sets in and i begin to fear this new wonderful thing coming to an end. And i get so tied up in the ending of the song and the thoughts of "when is it going to end?" "how will it finish?" and "how badly will i hurt, for how long?" that (that more times than so doesn't even end badly) that i forget to dance while the music is playing. that my total existance in the 'right now' is hendered by the possibility if a crashing hault (which more times than so doesn't even occur)
i wish that i had as much contentment as Paul did to rejoice in the right now. He rejoiced in the unpleasantries of right now, i can't find it difficult to have peace and enjoy the moments. ~as a disclaimer, i am not always this way but the uncertainties of the physical future do scare me sometimes!
i hope that you can find contentment and joy in your right now!
wow! darla's comment about old women dancing in the moolight put such a vibrant picture in my mind and then Andy's blog added a new light to it, a twist with many emaotions attached to the dancing i invisioned. He put experiances to it that made me think of striking out on a new adventure or endeavor without fear... wow! what an inspiration that brings to me.
i can begin new things pretty easily and usually they start out with ease and the void of fear. But as i get just inside something new and begin to think that it is something great~as the song begins to play iand i get the urge to 'dance with life'~; my anxiousness and panic sets in and i begin to fear this new wonderful thing coming to an end. And i get so tied up in the ending of the song and the thoughts of "when is it going to end?" "how will it finish?" and "how badly will i hurt, for how long?" that (that more times than so doesn't even end badly) that i forget to dance while the music is playing. that my total existance in the 'right now' is hendered by the possibility if a crashing hault (which more times than so doesn't even occur)
i wish that i had as much contentment as Paul did to rejoice in the right now. He rejoiced in the unpleasantries of right now, i can't find it difficult to have peace and enjoy the moments. ~as a disclaimer, i am not always this way but the uncertainties of the physical future do scare me sometimes!
i hope that you can find contentment and joy in your right now!
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
don't forget to laugh
this was posted at the end of an email with pictures and stories about the crazy life parents with boys may have...
Laughter...
enhances respiration and circulation,
oxygenates the blood,
suppresses the stress-related hormaones in the brain,
activiates the immune system,
stimulate practically all the large organs in the body,
and relesaes endorphins, the body's natural pain reliever
which also produces a feeling of well being.
I have heard before that laughter is the best medicine and i have also heard that i laugh too much, BUT i haven't been a general physician since i moved to atascosa county...almost 7 years ago! :) i think that there is no such thing as too much laughter!
May you have a life full of wonderful things to make you laugh!
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
yippy!
during a few spare moments this morning, i was on the internet here at school. I was checking my email and just kinda looking around. I haven't been able to get on blogger for quite some time now because the site has been blocked:( today i thought i would try, just to see what would happen and OH MY GOODNESS, it let me on!!!!:) who knows how long it will be on and available, but i will take advantage while i can!
today has been a slow day and i have been a bit tired. i was out Monday and Tuesday this week for a workshop in San Antonio. The workshop was good and interesting and useful, but it alwasys makes me tired to sit all day listening to lecture and not be moving around with my kiddos, enjoying my schedule. It IS nice to be back today!:)
i am also tired b/c i got in later last night than i usually would like, but the reason was exceptional! Lin and I met Dana in San Marcos and went out for birthday dinner!!!! Everything is better when in the company of my girls! we had a really good time eating, and talking, laughing and JUST BEING SILLY; that is however the best way to be!!!
I gotta go, it's time for my kiddos to come see me! maybe i'll have something to talk about later this week! I'll see most of you tonight and will hopefully be back on soon! hugs and kisses
today has been a slow day and i have been a bit tired. i was out Monday and Tuesday this week for a workshop in San Antonio. The workshop was good and interesting and useful, but it alwasys makes me tired to sit all day listening to lecture and not be moving around with my kiddos, enjoying my schedule. It IS nice to be back today!:)
i am also tired b/c i got in later last night than i usually would like, but the reason was exceptional! Lin and I met Dana in San Marcos and went out for birthday dinner!!!! Everything is better when in the company of my girls! we had a really good time eating, and talking, laughing and JUST BEING SILLY; that is however the best way to be!!!
I gotta go, it's time for my kiddos to come see me! maybe i'll have something to talk about later this week! I'll see most of you tonight and will hopefully be back on soon! hugs and kisses
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
life's cycle
i have always found it interesting how the lives of creatures and aspects in nature circle each other. how one thing uses another and at the same time, helps something different. and how the sun is the life of most things; things that use and help other things.
Being in the light of the SON gives us life and allows us to be helped by one friend and at the same time help someone else. i experiance that a lot but am fully aware of that wonder today. i think God is so awesome and am just dumbfounded that some find it hard to believe in Him, i find it impossible to believe that He's NOT here and working so powerfully in my life. i have been allowed by God to help 2 friends this afternoon, 2 of my greatest friends, 2 friends that have wiped my tears so many times, 2 friends that show their love in boundless ways, 2 friends that i owe many smiles to.
Christ's love compells us to love. we love him because He has first loved us. We love each other because He has taught us how to love by His example. And we continue loving each other because of the way they react to our love. ( i know that is not always the case and that we love some regargless of how they feel about us) but it sure is a lot easier for me to love those who treat me so much better than they should, much better than i deserve ~hum, sounds like grace~
do unto others as you would have them do to you; you want love, show it, you will recieve so much more than you give, but give it unselfishly, it is given unselfishly on your behalf everyday!
~may you be blessed with the love that i have been blessed with today! inspired by dana's blog:)
Being in the light of the SON gives us life and allows us to be helped by one friend and at the same time help someone else. i experiance that a lot but am fully aware of that wonder today. i think God is so awesome and am just dumbfounded that some find it hard to believe in Him, i find it impossible to believe that He's NOT here and working so powerfully in my life. i have been allowed by God to help 2 friends this afternoon, 2 of my greatest friends, 2 friends that have wiped my tears so many times, 2 friends that show their love in boundless ways, 2 friends that i owe many smiles to.
Christ's love compells us to love. we love him because He has first loved us. We love each other because He has taught us how to love by His example. And we continue loving each other because of the way they react to our love. ( i know that is not always the case and that we love some regargless of how they feel about us) but it sure is a lot easier for me to love those who treat me so much better than they should, much better than i deserve ~hum, sounds like grace~
do unto others as you would have them do to you; you want love, show it, you will recieve so much more than you give, but give it unselfishly, it is given unselfishly on your behalf everyday!
~may you be blessed with the love that i have been blessed with today! inspired by dana's blog:)
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